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" Note – she's one of very few who habitually use my full given name. "Will you need one room or two?"She managed to surprise me in that. "Oh, so long as you don't mind, Mum, one room is fine." I'm happy you've found someone to be your companion, Joseph. That's more important to me these days than proprieties."Well, you could have knocked me over with a feather. But I wasn't about to deprive myself of my bed-mate in order to pretend Denise and I were no more than 'friends'.As usual, I asked neighbours to keep an eye on the house, and I set various timers and devices that would turn lights, radios and such like on and off to give an appearance of the house being occupied.Anyway, we set off a couple of days short of Christmas, suitably clad against the winter cold and damp ... remember, on a motorbike, you have to contend with wind-chill, equivalent to a degree drop in temperature for every mile per hour of wind-speed ... and arrived at my mother's house in Newark, Nottinghamshire, mid. “Original enough for you, twink?” Melanie asked Sue between gasps.“Yes, spontaneous too,” Sue answered. “Jake, be a dear and grab me one of those cold beers, will you please?” she added.Jake asked, “Everybody?” and Mel and I nodded, so he pulled four beers from the cooler and passed them around.As we started the second beer Melanie suggested, “I want to play serial musical kebabs next.”“What the hell is that?” I asked, seeing the same question reflected in Jake and Sue's faces.“Work it out,” my lawyer wife challenged.“Let's see,” I mused. “We know that 'kebab' is your term for one cock in your mouth and another in your pussy. 'Serial' means what it always means – you want more than one done in sequence. But 'musical'?” I snapped my fingers. “Musical chairs! We put some music on, when the track finishes we switch ladies. And we keep doing that until the music stops or we all run out of gas. Right?”“Right,” confirmed Melanie, “Except for the very last part. The music won't finish.
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